Yesterday, George Bush gave a speech, his voice was steady and his gaze was steadier. No deer-staring-at-the-headlights or afraid-someone-will-ask-something-hard expressions tonight. Bush’s wife sat in between Tony Blair and Rudolph Giuliani.
Monday’s Late Show opened with Letterman sitting stiffly behind his desk. He talked about whether or not he should be doing his show. His expression betrayed fear, creases showed on his face where there hadn’t been creased before, his hands seemed to be shaking, and at one point his voice cracked.
Letterman interviewed Dan Rather, who explained that Bin Laden felt like one of life’s losers. Rather collapsed into an emotional heap, grabbing Letterman’s hand and, gasping, asked him to take the show to a commercial.
Jeff Bezos is appearing in a Taco Bell commercial.
I bought a camera case. I walked into the store and noticed that all the sales people were gathered near the back of the store. The man who had sold me my camera the other day walked behind the counter in my general direction, looking at me suspiciously. He helped me select a case and we went over to the cash register. He pointed at my camera and said, “Those are nice little cameras,” making small talk. “Yep, you sold it to me.” “I thought you looked familiar.” Then he pointed out the window and told me, “I’ve called the wagon to pick that guy up.” I looked and didn’t see anybody. “He’s always there asking for change and sometimes he blows up and yells at customers.” I left and saw the man nodding off against the building with a hat on the sidewalk in front of him.
I’m told that cynicism is now dead.