July 2004 Print Calendar

A sheet of ISO A4 paper, cut in half, forms two sheets of paper that retain the width/length ratio of the original page – two sheets of ISO A5 paper. Quartered, the sheet of A4 becomes four sheets of A6, and those four sheets will also hold the shape of the original. If a sheet of letter size paper is divided into two, you’re left with two sheets of paper whose width/length ratio doesn’t resemble the original, in a size that has no official name. Two undefined scraps of paper… There’s a certain freedom in that; which is why, while others are celebrating their national holidays next month, I’ll be celebrating letter size paper.

There’s a special focus on the national holiday in the July 2004 Beans for Breakfast print calendar. Also, due to popular demand, the small calendars for the next and previous months have returned. Celebrate July and your favorite paper format by printing out the Beans for Breakfast monthly print calendar. It’s available in letter size and A4 format, both files are 135 kb PDFs.

Letter size (Canada and USA)
A4 format (200 other countries)

Contest Results

[Cold K in a parking lot]

Early in the spread of the Gmail invitation meme, beta testers were asking people to perform in exchange for a Gmail invitation. Things have changed in the last couple of weeks. Invitations have been spread widely enough that the Ebay value of a Gmail account has dropped to four for a dollar and some bloggers are simply posting the number of invitations they have and handing them out on a first-come first-served basis. I wanted to test whether the proliferation of invitations has grown enough that those who are without Gmail could now demand something from Gmail users who are bogged down with too many invitations. So I created the contest. Readers were asked to submit a limerick and I promised to accept a Gmail invitation from one of the entrants.

The contest received three entries. My absurdist hypothesis was proven correct, at least among webloggers whose names start with “J”. The poets were John Poetzel, Jerry Halsted, and Jeff Schuler. Each of the entries was a tortured rhyme about me, and only one of them was dirty.

On to the winners: First prize goes to Jeff Schuler — mostly because I’ve already accepted a Gmail invitation from him, but also because his name is similar to mine. John and Jerry, the runners-up, won’t be walking away empty-handed yet. They’ll both be receiving copies of Who’s Who in Beans for Breakfast Limerick Challenge Entrants for only $29.95. Of course it costs nothing to have your name listed in this prestigious directory, but to place a picture of you or a pet alongside your listing, I’ll have to charge an additional printing fee of $9.95. (And if John or Jerry risked entering without a Gmail account or a supply of invitations, I can probably arrange an invitation.)

If anyone wants to relieve me of the burden of having to hand out Gmail invitations, let me know. All unreasonable demands will be considered (once I have invitations to give away).

Thank you for playing the Beans for Breakfast Limerick Challenge.

Busy Work

He gets the engine of his pressure washer going with a short tug on the starter chord and unfolds out of his crouch. A yellow butterfly flaps and twists, rising up and away from the puttering engine. Now he tucks himself into the side of the building clutching the trigger on a tensed length of hose and waiting for the passing foot traffic to open up.

A Contest

Baptist Booth, Fremont Solstice Parade, 6/19

Scientology Tent, Pier 57, 6/21


I will accept a Gmail invitation from the person who writes the best limerick in this entry’s comments.

Beware of the Walls

"Coldkiller" van

Tom and Rachel have been on the Coldk beat. Rachel writes:

“Cold K is real and he has something to tell us. The pac-man ghosts come out at night, slip in and out of the daytime with creepy drugged-out eyes and tell us, ‘Beware of the world cold killer!’ . . . . The ghosts disappear and reappear like real ghosts, and create a sleepy infection across Capitol Hill.”

And among Tom’s Coldk photos, this one: “BOTW”

BOTW?

"Beware of the walls ses Cold Killer!"

BOTW: “Beware of the Walls”

Google led me to a “Beware of the Walls” reference in the Stranger. Emily Hall wrote (scroll down):

“I knew about Beware of the Walls before I discovered him. What I mean is that I had looked at the stencil gang’s work–which consists most publicly of stenciled images spray-painted onto building walls and newspaper boxes and highway underpasses–before I ever really saw it. The distinction between seeing and looking is important here; these are the kinds of works that occupy a hole in your peripheral vision, or else they become part of the landscape that has become invisible with familiarity, until you see them.”

That’s from a listing of art goings-on, published just as Bush was beginning his Iraq Adventures. In the introduction, Hall wrote (links mine):

“It may seem like war is all there is to think about or write about lately, but there’s more going on in Seattle than just demonstrations and handwringing. And while the war news may be all bad, all the time, it turns out there’s a lot to be excited about: people, events, movements, new philosophies.”

Aside from the scrap of Coldk background, I have no conclusions, just further handwringing.