Contest Results

[Cold K in a parking lot]

Early in the spread of the Gmail invitation meme, beta testers were asking people to perform in exchange for a Gmail invitation. Things have changed in the last couple of weeks. Invitations have been spread widely enough that the Ebay value of a Gmail account has dropped to four for a dollar and some bloggers are simply posting the number of invitations they have and handing them out on a first-come first-served basis. I wanted to test whether the proliferation of invitations has grown enough that those who are without Gmail could now demand something from Gmail users who are bogged down with too many invitations. So I created the contest. Readers were asked to submit a limerick and I promised to accept a Gmail invitation from one of the entrants.

The contest received three entries. My absurdist hypothesis was proven correct, at least among webloggers whose names start with “J”. The poets were John Poetzel, Jerry Halsted, and Jeff Schuler. Each of the entries was a tortured rhyme about me, and only one of them was dirty.

On to the winners: First prize goes to Jeff Schuler — mostly because I’ve already accepted a Gmail invitation from him, but also because his name is similar to mine. John and Jerry, the runners-up, won’t be walking away empty-handed yet. They’ll both be receiving copies of Who’s Who in Beans for Breakfast Limerick Challenge Entrants for only $29.95. Of course it costs nothing to have your name listed in this prestigious directory, but to place a picture of you or a pet alongside your listing, I’ll have to charge an additional printing fee of $9.95. (And if John or Jerry risked entering without a Gmail account or a supply of invitations, I can probably arrange an invitation.)

If anyone wants to relieve me of the burden of having to hand out Gmail invitations, let me know. All unreasonable demands will be considered (once I have invitations to give away).

Thank you for playing the Beans for Breakfast Limerick Challenge.

Categorized as Before


  1. What an honor! And all I really wanted was to have the world realize my unfathomable limerick talents.

    I am looking forward to the day when I can make your car payments and help out a bit with groceries. Do you have any kids who will need to be sent to college?

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